Most of the usual suspects, sans Paul A. and Michelle, attended this morning’s session: Heather, John, Chad, Lauren, Rex, and Kristin. Michael Kelley arrived wearing his new Zeal socks; thus, he was dressed in shades of red, black, and grey from head to fat ass to toe. He could not have looked more gay girlie handsome.
We warmed up with “Spiderman”, high knees, airplanes, and running backwards. I was the last to begin, and the last to start the next warm up activity: 15-12-9 OHS and double unders. I was, however, one of if not the first to complete OHS and dus. Pick up the pace, bitches.
The following conversation took place between MK and PP, with both what I and what I can only imagine MK were thinking in italics.
MK: Your overhead squats look good. I’m so wonderful for teaching you how to squat correctly! Please thank me, and tell me how handsome I am.
PP: (Silence.) Michael Kelley wants me to acknowledge him. I shan’t.
MK: Aren’t you going to say anything? I just said your overhead squats look good. Please acknowledge me, Paul! I am nothing without you.
PP: Yes, they are good. Why does Michael Kelley think he deserves all of the credit? Aren’t I the one who’s actually doing the damn squats? Jack and Coach S. also deserve some credit. What a baby.
MK: Yes, they are good. You’ve really improved. Is that all you have to say? Praise me, Paul! I will spend the rest of the day crying if you don’t give me at least some credit.
PP: (Silence.) You are sooooo needy, Michael Kelley. Bat your long eye lashes all that you want. If you’re nice, I’ll treat you to dinner one night this week. Oh, and you’re fat. I forgot to think that.
I focused on ensuring that I used a snatch grip, that I shrugged my shoulders, that I pointed the “pits” of my elbows toward the sky, and that I didn’t allow the bar to come forward of vertical from hips and feet. Yes, I’m only using a 45# bar. Form, consistency, and then intensity. While completing the set of 9 I actually thought, “I’m looking forward to an overhead squat series.” Oh. My. God.
Low Bar Back Squat
2-3 warm up sets
5 @ 60% | 132/135
5 @ 65% | 143/145
5 @ 75% | 165
5 @ 75%
I asked Michael Kelley if we should do any warm up sets, and he said, “Don’t you already feel warmed up?” Thus, I began with 5 @ 60%. I wasn’t feeling particularly strong today, but all sets nonetheless went well. As Michael Kelley was engaged in what I can only imagine was thought-provoking conversation with my fellow CFers, he didn’t observe a single set.
3 pull-ups on the minute for 10 minutes.
If you hit all 30 last week, increase extra weight or reduce band help. If you did not hit 30, try to hit more total reps at the same resistance.
While I only “hit” 29 pull-ups last week whilst wearing a 10# weight vest, I nonetheless increased weight to 12#. (Wouldn’t “achieved”, “were successful in completing” or even “got” be better than “hit”? What was Michael Kelley thinking when he composed this description?)
I was successful in completing all 30 reps, although it sure was tempting to kip.
20 DB or KB Walking Lunges
Uhm, it’s nearly impossible to do walking lunges with kettle bells, as it would be far too easy to rest the KBs on the floor. Thus, I used 40# dumb bells. Yes, my left arm is still somewhat hurts, so I substituted toes through rings for toes to bar.
This was one of the most miserable met-cons that I can recall. I did complete all rounds of toes through rings unbroken. The DB walking lunges were a bitch. I did the first 2 sets unbroken, the third set in reps of 10, the fourth set in reps of 10, 6 & 4, and the last set in reps of 10. I completed 4 rounds + 20 walking lunges + 2 toes through rings.
My forearms were throbbing, so much so that even putting them away was painful. By the way, 80# is 56% of my bodyweight (and 36% of Michael Kelley’s).