Another lengthy blog, folks. My apologies.
Michael Kelley and I exchanged the following sexts yesterday morning:
5:55 (Just after I checked into CFBC via Facebook.)
MK: Have fun
MK: Box whore
7:00 (Just after leaving CFB.)
PP: Great coaching!
MK: F u
PP: I feel like I cheated on you.
PP: I’m not saying that I didn’t like it.
MK: You’re dirty
MK: Go shower
8:24 (Just after I posted blog.)
MK: Pros and cons lists
PP: Damn, girl, you’re a fast reader.
PP: I meant “fat” reader.
The sexting continued, and it was full of ultimatums (MK), tears (MK), ranting (MK), pleading (MK), and laughing at Michael Kelley (PP).
I took Luke for a walk around Lake Pine yesterday evening. He had little interest in running, probably because the temperature was still in the lower 90s and because he had spent the previous two days carousing at Doggie Village. Quite a few runners passed us, and this thought crossed my mind: I have no interest in running – not even a mere two miles. This is certainly a change from the not so distant past…
It used to be that I would become envious if I saw someone running when I was not doing so, e.g., while I was driving the VW, biking, walking Xander, etc.
Thus, after more than a decade of running, I can now unequivocally state that I am longer a runner. Yes, I run when I CrossFit and I most certainly enjoy running when it’s included in a metcon. Regardless, I’m not a runner, for I don’t enjoy running just to be, well, running.
I recently visited the best specialty shoe store in the triangle, Bull City Running, and had a delightful conversation with George. We had the following exchange:
George: Do you think you’ll ever –
Paul: No, I’ll never race again.
George: You knew what I was going to ask before I even had the opportunity to ask the question.
Paul: Yes, I’m that certain that I will never race again.
I used to be consumed with running, reading every blog, subscribing to every magazine, reading every book, watching every televised event or movie dealing with the topic. I purchased far too many running shoes, shirts, and shorts, and every running product that came on the market, from socks to BodyGlide to a GPS. I also used to run 6 to 7 days a week, and would log between 60 and 110 miles a week. Just about every Sunday morning, I would meet up with a group of like-minded people and run for hours at a time. You really get to know people when you spend that much time with them, and I developed many (what I considered at the time) close friendships.
I suffered far too many overuse injuries. When I was injured, I couldn’t do much of anything else — except be very depressed. I wasn’t the least bit pleasant to be around. Don’t believe me? Ask Jeff.
The only thing I really knew how to do was run. I didn’t know how to dead-lift, back squat, clean, jerk, snatch, swing a kettle bell, do a ring dip or muscle up, complete a double under, jump much higher than 20 inches, the list goes on and on.
I ran far too many races, racing almost every weekend. Yes, I was fast for my age. Yes, I enjoyed the competition. Yes, I continued to improve. But then a funny thing happened: I began to grow very bored with running. I would be at the starting line of a race with the gun just about to go off, and I couldn’t make myself get excited. I still nonetheless continued to enjoy marathons and ultras, as running that distance is always a challenge.
How dare I consider running boring! Okay, let’s see, you do the very same thing over and over and over again, namely run. Yes, interval training mixes things up a bit, but you’re still, well, lifting one leg and foot in front of the other.
What the hell does this have to do with today’s WOD? Read on, bitches. Read on.
I arrived at 5:35, so that I could open the box and stretch my shoulders. Bench presses Wednesday and thrusters yesterday have led to very tight shoulders.
Michael Kelley looked like Lawrence “Chunk” Cohen from the “Goonies”. Chunk led us through a warm up, and I just wasn’t feeling it. Chunk said, “Do you ever worry about what people think when you say that you don’t like working out with big groups?” I replied, “It’s my blog, and I’ll say whatever the hell I want to say.”
It comes down to this basic principle: I am selfish. And egotistical. And narcissistic. And incredibly good-looking. Thus, I don’t like people impeding my workout, e.g., having to wait too long between reps, and having to use weights and/or equipment other than what I had planned on using.
This is not to say that I don’t enjoy working out with certain people, because I do!
Dynamic Effort Lower
Seated Box Jumps, 10-15 attempts to hit max height
The boys got into a “mine is bigger than yours” contest, and I wanted nothing to do with them. The level of testosterone has been particularly high as of late. I jumped 34” and was quite satisfied. I was most satisfied in that I didn’t have to wait my turn to do so.
Speed Squat (to 12″ box) 10×2 @ 65%, rest 1 minute (or as long as it takes to rotate through w/1-2 others)
Chunk said, “There are enough racks to go around. Everyone but Paul team up with one other person. Paul, you get a rack to yourself.”
I set up my rack, and Burt timidly approached and asked, “How much are you squatting?” I said, “160 pounds.” He said, “That’s the weight I’m using.” “Please join me!” I loudly proclaimed for all to hear! I truly like Burt, and I enjoy working out with him.
Just prior to my ninth squat, Chunk said, “It’s important that you treat the first part of the squat like a high bar back squat, and the last part like a low bar back squat, pushing your hips back and then exploding off of the box.” Thanks, Chunk, for providing this direction after we had already incorrectly completed all but two squats.
Speed Dead-lift 8×1 @ 50% + band tension, rest 30 seconds
I’m loving dead-lifts once again. I put 170# on the bar and used a green band. I wanted to do many more than 8 reps.
Using 60-65% of 1RM Front Squat
5 Cycles of Barbell Complex
60m Shuttle Sprint
Complex (1 Cycle): 1 Clean (full squat), 1 Jerk (or any way overhead), 1 Back Squat, 1 Jerk (or any way overhead)
Shuttle will be run in 10m increments
Uhm, 60% of FS 1RM is 135#, and there was no way in hell that I was going to lift that weight. Chunk “allowed” me to use 95#, the same weight I used for thrusters yesterday.
I enjoyed this metcon much more than I thought I would, but for reasons that quite frankly surprised me.
I began by cleaning and then squatting, but by the second round was cleaning into a full squat. And. It. Felt. Good. I remembered to wait for full hip extension to thrust bar overhead. I struggled positioning the bar behind my head, and struggled even more thrusting it overhead from this position. I banged my head the last rep of the third round and the first rep of the very last two that I completed. The biggest challenge was pressing it overhead from behind my head with a closer-than-normal grip. In other words, I’m used to the wide grip that I use for snatch or overhead squats, and not the narrower grip that I use for cleans. Chunk, should I have repositioned my hands before pressing overhead? If so, it would’ve been nice if you had said that. I tried to get your attention during the metcon, but you were busy adjusting your junk.
I found the shuttle runs exceedingly boring, mindless, and useless. Read that again. Go ahead, I’ll wait for you. Done? Good. Running takes so little effort that I don’t find it the least bit challenging. I would’ve preferred to do as many rounds as possible of the complex in six minutes and not run at all.
What have I become?
I did 3 x 15 glute bridges using 95# for the cash out.
I spent a few minutes with Luca, John, and newbie Steve showing them how to do jumping muscle ups. John was able to successfully complete two! Luca and Steve, ring dips first, muscle ups next.
I arrived at the box after 5, and spent some time conversing with Paul A. and truly enjoying his company. (I miss you, Paul A. And your lovely wife, too.) Margaret asked why I always refer to Chunk by his first and last name. I said, “I wish your last name was ‘Hunt,’ Michael Kelley. Then I’d call you ‘Mike.’”
Today’s accessory work was courtesy of Chunk and was exhausting. It consisted of 6, 60m sled pulls with 30 Russian twists between rounds while holding a 15# plate during twists. That’s 190 Russian twists total, ladies and gentlemen. Chunk instructed me to go “painfully heavy” on sled pulls, and that’s what I did.
I completed 3 rounds of forward sled pulls pulling 145 (bodyweight) first and 160 second and third rounds. I completed backward sled pulls pulling 135, 140, and 145# for the 3 rounds, respectively. I’m not including the weight of the sled, which is 10#.
My first goal was to pause only at the turnaround, and it took every ounce of resolve to pull that damn sled 30m. My second goal was to complete all rounds of Russian twists unbroken. Keep in mind that a rep was a twist to both the left and the right sides. Not at all surprisingly, I achieved both goals.
I finished the day by practicing 15′ rope climbs, climbing the rope 6 times before feeling the skin on my ankle tear. Ouch.
Chunk has said this before, and he said it again tonight: “You’re stronger than I am, Paul.” Uhm, explain yourself, Chunk.